As parents, we’re naturally prone and conditioned to put others first – namely our children. If we’re sick, we struggle on to wash their tiny clothes and make healthy lunch packs. If our partner is feeling stressed, we might let go of a few work commitments to help them get through their rough patch. This commonly leads to a state of thinking we permanently need to be a supermom.
Thinking as moms that we need to do it all, from the school costumes to cooking for the bake sale, taking time away from work to look after the little ones plus keep the house in order is a lot. It’s a fight between doing what actually matters, and what we think we should be doing to maintain the supermom appearance to onlookers. When, in fact, this can be quite damaging. Not just for you but for other moms who feel they’re not living up to being the ultimate super mom. The fact is something always has to give. You can’t be at every play, or always beat the anxiety of not being there every time your child has an accident, make the dinners, clean the house and run your business effectively without putting something on the back burner. And this something, most of the time, usually tends to be your health and wellbeing.
What Truly Matters?
To break the mask of supermom perfection, it’s time to think about what actually matters in your life. And what can either be cancelled or tended to later. So that you may make some time to look after yourself. Not just on one occasion, but forever. Your supermom syndrome might tell you you need to cook every meal to ensure your family gets their nutrition. When actually one night off of cooking and ordering a takeaway isn’t the end of the world. Plus it means you don’t need to spend time cooking and washing up. If you were supposed to take your children to dance class, but your close friend calls you about a crisis, you don’t need to feel like you have to do it all. Chances are searching for an advocate from a criminal lawyers firm is more important at that moment than your children wanting to attend dance class and so it won’t hurt them to wait until you have time to take them to the next dance class.
Know When to Take a Step Back
Although helping others is a thoughtful and kind attribute of one’s character, it also works to deplete your well of energy, time, patience and generosity. This is why taking the time to take care of you is vital. Even if that means cutting back a little bit from helping others. Or finding something or someone else that can take over for a little while. By pushing back your needs further and further, a breakdown is on the horizon creeping gradually towards you. To prevent this from happening, step back and think about you. At least for a moment.
Altering our perception of what others think we should be doing and what actually matters to us is an integral part of breaking away from the common traps most parents fall into. Sometimes we can get so wrapped in how we think something should be done we waste our precious effort on things that don’t actually matter to us that much deep down.